R E F L E X I O N S

I was reading From Time Immemorial and so taken by it, I stopped, took pen and paper and began to write the following. So it's under the shock of the moment.
The more I read about the suffering my people have endured over the ages, by every community in the world and in execrable ways, the less I want to live, because I'll live to read about more of this suffering and feel tortured by what my ancestors and correligionists have endured.
 This book tells the story of what the Jews experienced in each of the Arab countries where they lived, and how they survived it all is almost unimaginable. The fact that the world is witness to these acts and does nothing makes the acceptance of such a situation even more sickening.

What can I do?
How can I repair all that has been done?
All those dead whose only guilt was being Jewish. History is repeating itself. Will it happen again?
I'm too bitter. I won't let it happen to me, as so many have done, withdrawing into their religion. It may have its advantages, but it hasn't saved millions of men, women and children throughout history.
Both Christians and Arabs are guilty. Do they know it? I doubt it. We forget. Everything is forgotten.

What's left are books that recount the past without erasing or repairing it. Should I rejoice in the death of my enemy? What's in it for me? nothing. satisfaction? not even that. How can I explain it to the world? It has to be willing to listen.
This subject confuses me to no end.it takes away my zest for life.how can I live when I'm learning all this, feeling powerless.you can't change the past.
How can we change the future?
Men of good will do exist, but where are they? Misunderstood, probably like so many others.
There was a time when it was fashionable to execute the enemy, the Jew, the scapegoat of so many generations. Societies encouraged each other, armies delighted in it, and our nation suffered without even being able to defend itself. And if it did, it was worse.

Where are we going?
When I think that religions have often been at the root of all these massacres, I wonder what their purpose is: why not renounce any religion that advocates hatred and violence? Yes, men are weak; yes, men need leaders, but these leaders let themselves be fooled as much by the promises made by their religion as by their desire for power. This famous desire that ruins civilizations in the name of an individual, whether Jesus, Mohammed, Attila, Hitler or Khomeini.
When will we learn? When will the cult of the individual collapse? When will the human race resign itself to living and conceive that harmony and equality rather than permanent competition are the symbols of a life.
The present is hardly a guarantee, when we see that anti-Semitism continues to spread. Governments, with their famous freedom of expression, have no recourse, they pass it by, hoping it will go away, but it won't. I can't wait, I can't wait to see what happens.
I can't wait, can't wait to stop hearing the libels and defamations that are constantly being hurled at us. I'm afraid, however, that in my lifetime, I'll never cease to be a witness, and that's why, as I'm no longer alive, I'll have the privilege of no longer suffering from all this.

Yes, I realize this is all disturbing, especially the bad thoughts that run through my mind in this conclusion.
But we have to talk about it